Before I give you my review of the movie I saw, let me start off by explaining to you what I did when I got back home after I watched it. I was going to start writing immediately but before that I decided to pour myself a glass of whiskey and listen to the Miley Cyrus song Wrecking Ball. For those who do not know me, I am not that much of a fan of whiskey and I cannot stand Miley Cyrus. For some reason though, before I could even think of this movie again, I needed to gulp down something that felt like it was burning my insides while listening to something that would anger me at the same time in order to jolt myself back into reality. All that being said, this experience did not even come close to how badly I felt about the movie Lucy.
I went to see this movie with Thomas, who thought it was a comedy. He thinks that this movie is the best of the summer so far, and will hopefully be giving his very different review soon. It was he who forced me back into my seat when I wanted to leave about 30 minutes in (as soon as she makes the phone call to her mother). I have never thought of seriously about leaving a movie before this one, not even when Chase made us watch the first two Transformers movies back to back.
The following is in the trailer so I feel comfortable with this not being considered a spoiler. Lucy is a woman who gets knocked out, opened up, and gets a new strand of drugs surgically implanted under her “lower tummy” so she could smuggle them across the border. After someone imprisons her for trying to follow through with her task, he then tries to feel her up. After he is surprised that Lucy may not be that into him, he punches and then kicks her. The kick makes a hole in the bag and her body absorbs the drugs. After a short Exorcist routine, she is able to use more and more of her brain’s capacity throughout the movie. This allows her to do the unimaginable, such as change her appearance, use telekinesis, and even channel Animal Planet into her subconscious.
Up until this movie, I have been a huge fan of Scarlett Johansson. Her acting in this is one of the most bland things I have seen. While I should blame the writing and not her, I do not know if I will be able to take her seriously again. In all honesty, I suppose she played her part fairly well because the blandness was a part of her character.
As she begins to use more of her brain she starts losing, more or less her words, the feelings that make us human. The main problem with this is that now the movie has a boring and unrelatable protagonist. If you want to do something like that to a protagonist, fine–but make it happen towards the end of the movie like in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest or Wall-E. This way, we can have a hero that we like and is filled with personality. Then, we would be devastated when we see him or her lose all of that. It should have made us wonder if gaining absolute knowledge would be worth it if we lost ourselves in the process. We should have seen someone we care about change instead of simply watching a blank slate remain a blank slate.
Before I finish this review, I suppose I should mention Morgan Freeman. He played another character in the movie that proved to me that they needed to make a second draft of their script.
Freeman played the part of a scientist who became famous for making educated guesses for a living. He is understandably confused when he finds out his guesswork happens to be spot on. Lucy calls him up to say that he was correct and he kind of just goes with it. When everything starts to hit the fan his fellow scientists turn to him for explanations which end up being more guesses that they never question. Apparently, you can get away with bullshitting everyone around you when you have a silky smooth voice like Freeman’s. His character could have easily been much more than what it was. The movie could have even revolved around him as he investigates a mysterious figure who shows up validating everything he believed in. Instead, he is just a character that everyone follows and believes for seemingly no reason as he makes guesses about what is happening.
I know for reviews on here we give a rating, but I cannot honestly think of what to give it. The movie was not necessarily poorly filmed nor had bad acting, it was just awkward, boring, and had bad writing. With this movie following the Fifty Shades of Grey trailer, the people to my right taking the movie seriously, and Thomas at my left cracking up the whole time, I felt more awkward during this movie than I ever had with any other film. I liked the first 10-15 minutes of it and how the action just started, but as soon as Johansson got drugged, apparently told not to act, and then called her mom to tell her she remembered what her breast milk tasted like, it completely lost my interest.
If you decide to see this movie, do not see it seriously nor alone. See it with friends who will all make fun of this. I can see this movie having showings one day with a cult following like The Room or The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Just realize that there are two possible outcomes. You will leave like Thomas, saying he never realized Johansson could do comedy. Or you could leave like me, someone who has never smoked, but for some reason craves a cigarette and is worried he will facepalm everytime Black Widow shows up in the Avengers 2. If I had to sum up this movie in one sentence it would be, “A movie with a decent cast that had poor writing and no real character development.” This movie had potential, but ended up being one of the worst movies I have seen.
A quick side note about the Fifty Shades trailer. Never before have I been in a theater where everyone was in complete silence for a full minute for any reason, let alone because everyone felt awkward and uncomfortable. You could have heard a pin drop! I am waiting for someone to tell me that this movie is actually a practical joke and that it is not really happening.